I have recently made contact with an old school friend, someone I lost touch with when my family moved to Queensland. Catching up on 25 years worth of news was wonderful, with many more conversations and memories yet to be shared, and laughed at!
I was struck at the end of the conversation by how easy it was; picking up the threads of our past, weaving them into our present and choosing new coloured threads for the future. Some souls never forget each other, even though the space between conversations can be 25 years wide.
During the floods, we made some new friends and although no history is shared, barrring that week of isolation, there is a connection and firmness to the friendships that, I think, doesn’t happen that often. Some souls instantly connect, even though the space between meeting and the present is only a few months distance.
For me, life is all about relationships; the relationships between us and others, between us and nature, between us and ourselves. Successful relationships are those that somehow traverse and navigate the juxtaposition of keeping ourselves happy and keeping the other person happy. It is true that we are responsible for our own happiness and that true happiness and joy are not external things that happen ‘to’ us, rather, they are internal things that happen ‘in’ us, yet the art and practice of making others happy is significant in our relationships. If all we did was keep ourselves happy, we would be living in a society full of divorce, disunity, and selfishness – oh wait….we are.
Some schools of thought are big on the “Well, if I’m happy first, then I am a better mother, wife, sister etc.” True to a certain extent, yet all around me, when I look hard enough, I can see people who place another’s happiness before their own. These are the people who seem to be the happiest, who have found peace and the joy that comes from giving. When you really boil it all down, what else do we have in life, but those we love and who love us and at the end of the day, keeping ourselves happy will really only get us so far.
Once we really and truly reconcile ourselves to the fact that we need each other, that our very existence on this planet relies on our co-dependency, only then will we see real change in our societies and relationships.
Who are you going to make happy today? 🙂